so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Randomize
