guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
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