Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
