Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
it's like heaven, but drunker
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
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