maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize