i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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