If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
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