Screwed.edu
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
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