Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Randomize