omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
Brb crying the tears of my youth
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
I currently don't understand fingers.
Randomize
