Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Randomize
