Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
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u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
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