Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
Randomize
