porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
These Attractive Criminals Took Sexy Mugshots That Made Them Famous
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
This Girl’s Unbelievable Catfish Story Will Make You Rethink Online Dating
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half