all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Randomize