If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
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