I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
Randomize
