Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
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