K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
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