do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
