I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
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