You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
Damn victory sex feels great
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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