I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Randomize