i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
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