you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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