everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
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