Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
somebody snuck up and got me drunk
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
Randomize
