You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
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