lets start a swedish sibling band together
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
I see more hoeing in ur future
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