It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
Randomize
