I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
Randomize
