When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize
