just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
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