i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
