bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
stop calling my apartment porn island.
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Randomize
