Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
