Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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