i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
Things I've learned: after you move in with a girl it's much less satisfying to wipe your dick on her sheets after sex because now they're your sheets too
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
Randomize
