wake up i wanna do it froggy style
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
