i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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