Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
Acid is not a monday night drug
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
Drake has all the answers
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
wow bdsm is so cute
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