Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize