She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
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