Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
Sorry my hands just texted you
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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