Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Randomize
