If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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