the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
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