and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
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