oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
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