Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
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