lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
