Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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