I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
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